by Rhea Beaudry, Guest Blogger
What is Truth?
Truth is the glue that holds two together with bonds of trust.
Truth is the cord that binds together two hearts with laces of love.
Truth is the deep and strong foundation that stabilizes a relationship.
Truth is the pure, clear gaze that is an unimpeded window into the soul.
Truth is the harmony which enhances the melody of life.
Truth is the light that drives away clinging darkness.
Truth is the flame that warms the coldest corners of the stoniest cavern.
Truth is the tender bud that opens to the sun, even while knowing it will eventually be beaten by driving rain.
Truth is the clear stream that flows when the frozen masses are melted.
Without truth between two friends it is impossible
to know and be known,
to see and be seen,
to hear and be heard,
to speak and be spoken to in words that matter.
That which is not false.
That which is not deceitful.
That which is not hidden.
That which is not dishonest.
That which is not selfish.
Truth—transparency, a person’s integrity, his “good word”—is a treasure worth far more than gold. It is to be guarded and protected with all diligence.
The destruction of truth begins with “little lies of convenience or covering“ which we don’t believe will ever be found out, while thinking that the relationship will actually go better without the other knowing the full truth. We lose our transparency. Each time we are successful in one of these “small” lies, it becomes easier and easier to continue in this style to build ourselves up to appear bigger, better, stronger than we really are. The lies come oftener and become more significant in their scope. Somehow, we convince ourselves that we are safe within this covering, but the truth has a way of catching up with us and coming out. The resulting shock to the other person who trusted us is devastating and destructive. How much better it would have been to suffer the honest consequences of a failure or fall, than to give oneself temporary comfort with a dishonest excuse or coverup. How much better it would have been to endure the wounds of a true friend’s reaction to our failure or fault, than to receive underserved praise built on nonexistent achievements, and continue the deceitful and false words of a pretender.
“There are no such things as WHITE LIES. Lies are Lies. People lie for different reasons, but mostly because they don’t believe the Truth will get them what they want. Lying is very serious. God says LIARS will not inherit the Kingdom of Heaven. Lies beget lies. People who lie become addicted to LIES, and the demonic power it gives them over people. And their beliefs are or become lies, because Liars often tend to believe lies.They no longer care about the truth and can no longer tell the difference. Lying to people is a form of deceit, deception. It’s a demonic attack on a person, since people usually want to believe what other people tell them. Lying is a form of spiritual violence. It can devastate someone, and can rape your own soul. Rethink your ability to lie. Rethink your ‘’talent’’ in telling lies. Turn away from this addiction. Ask God to help you if this problem is yours. God only tells the truth. So should you.” Arthur Robins on Facebook
Once this breach of truth is made manifest—and scripture says it will be (“be sure your sin will find you out”)—a rift results, which is extremely difficult to repair. When the freely given and received expression of truth is stolen from a relationship, it is difficult to put it back. Fear of broken trust will taint the purity of love. Forgiveness can be given and received, and restoration of trust will be accomplished with time and patience, but nagging doubts will remain. Earnest resolve to be completely truthful in all words and actions must be accompanied with tried and tested proof in repeated actions. It takes time to re-prove that one’s word is true, and no is longer tainted with deception.
I was working on a project on my computer, and I had forgotten the name of a website on which I had discovered some really cute graphics that I wanted to use. I wracked my brain trying to remember, and couldn’t. So I decided to look in my computer history to find it.
Bad idea. I discovered dozens and dozens of hits on hard porn sites dated back from March to May. That was when I was letting my grandson use my computer while he spent time in my home after school. I had caught him with one that he accidentally left open, and confronted him. But I was shocked and horrified at the extent of time and depth he was into this, as proven by the huge number of sites listed in my history. I did not look into any of the sites, just the titles were awful enough. I was having a panic attack when Leon got home from work. Together we had his mother come over and I showed her what I had found. I had told her about it back when I confronted him, and she had removed all computer privileges and sent him to counseling. She spoke of how he has been having a very good summer. He is given NO unsupervised computer access at all and he only has a flip phone. He does not spend time with old friends. He went to El Salvador on a short term mission trip and came back a new man. He said he left the old self behind and is never going back. His way of putting it was that he had left it all on the field and was not going to take it back up. I am glad I shared what I had found with his mother. She and my husband were not surprised, but I, in my innocence and naivete, was shocked and horrified. This betrayal of trust had a massive impact on me! The devil was screaming at me: “Some ministry you had with him. No wonder he loved to come over! He knew how easy you would be.”
I prayed and did a prophetic act of cleansing my computer, right then and there. I erased all my history so that I could have a blank, clean slate to begin a new day. I prayed over myself, my home, my heart–everything–and released it all to God. I felt like the assault victim who runs to take a hot shower, and just scrubs and scrubs but still feels unclean and violated, and that there isn’t enough soap in the world to remove the stain. There was nothing I could do but trust God with all of it.
Dealing with the extent of my grandson’s porn addiction was terrible enough, but I think that his lying and betrayal of trust was what knocked me out cold upon the floor. If I had a dollar for every time I had told him during that time period that I was choosing to believe in him and trust him with my computer, I would be rich! I told him over and over that if he told me he was not using the computer to look at things that should not be seen, that was good enough for me. He assured me over and over. He lied over and over. He broke trust over and over. He wounded my spirit over and over. In addition, he defiled my computer and my home with the filth that he was viewing here while sitting in the same room with me.
I felt as though my pure love for him had been tainted. I was reeling from the shock of feeling like I’ve been violently sucker-punched in the face by one whom I love.
Have I loved him too deeply, Lord? I want my spirit to resonate with the frequency of Your love, and Your love alone. Take away from me any love that would seek to exalt itself over my love for You. This is a prayer for deep cleansing Lord. Clean away from my spirit anything that is not of You. I love these children with a tender love. They are precious to me. They are sweeter than candy to me. But You O Lord, are the Source of all that is good and pure and holy. If my love is a taste and a shadow of Your love for them, I embrace it with all that I am! If it has crossed over into any dimensions that it should not occupy, I ask You to remove it and restrain it. I give You full permission. I will have no idol before You. You will not share Your glory with another. Frail flesh cannot pollute Your love.You are HOLY. Call forth that which is HOLY in me for Yourself. Take away all that is not holy. Wave Your tuning fork over me and call forth the frequency of heaven from my spirit. Let me resonate with you. Let my love be Your love overflowing and filling the earth with Your Glory, Your Goodness. Let these children know that they have someone who loves them totally, unconditionally, overwhelmingly. Even if I must suffer pain as a result of this strong love, let it come forth! Let be totally unpolluted with flesh. Let Your vibration cleanse away all debris or pollution from my heart. Increase my capacity, Lord.
His mother had said she was not going to even bring this up to him because he is a new person now and doing so well. I was OK with her choice. But she capitulated, and told him about it.
He came over to talk to me. He said he is becoming a man now, and he needs to own the things he has done wrong. He values his relationship with me too much to leave anything hanging between us; so he came to clear the air. He apologized for hurting me so badly and betraying me. At the time, he said, he was under the control of the devil in his mind, and he did not care who he hurt. He said that he is not at all the same person he was at that time. I am glad he came to talk, and only hope it was not just because his mother made him do it. I told him I will still call him “Man of God”. That brought a sad little smile.
There has been some kind of acceleration in my process of releasing him. Something is different now in my heart. He is like a butterfly that I am setting free to fly high on the wind of God. I will always love him in a very special way, but I feel that a portion of our lives is ended now that can never be returned to. I continue to need reassurance from the Lord that my time with him was not wasted, that something good was accomplished…that I did not merely provide him with a convenient opportunity to sin, while I was trying to do just the opposite. Only God can assure me of that, and it will take time.
So, if “Christ in me is the hope of Glory”, whatever is in my heart is in there with Christ and is already assigned a hopeful outcome. Even heartbreak. He aims to bring goodness/glory from EVERY circumstance.
Psalm 55: “Give ear to my prayer, O God, And do not hide Yourself from my supplication. Attend to me, and hear me; I am restless in my complaint, and moan noisily, Because of the voice of the enemy, Because of the oppression of the wicked; For they bring down trouble upon me, And in wrath they hate me. My heart is severely pained within me, And the terrors of death have fallen upon me. Fearfulness and trembling have come upon me, And horror has overwhelmed me. So I said, “Oh, that I had wings like a dove! I would fly away and be at rest. Indeed, I would wander far off, And remain in the wilderness. Selah I would hasten my escape From the windy storm and tempest.”
Psalm 119:76: “Let, I pray, Your merciful kindness be for my comfort, According to Your word to Your servant.”
Lord, I thank You for Your goodness. Thank You that in my extreme weakness You are STRONG, and I am partnered with You for all eternity. You are my LIFE. In Your great love, You have cleansed my history and wiped my slate clean for a fresh start whenever I stumble.I purpose to do the same for those who have hurt me.
Promises that are made, even to the people we love the most, can not be kept unless they are surrendered to God. Loving Him with all of our heart, soul, strength and mind will open doors for Him to fill us with the grace and power to do what cannot be done in our failed humanity.
Live Dead says: The health of our spirits does not just rely on our discipline. Wonderful Jesus seeks us out (Psalm 119: 176: “I have gone astray like a lost sheep; Seek Your servant, For I do not forget Your commandments”) and takes responsibility for our intimacy with Him. How wonderful to be yoked with Jesus— not just for ministry, but also for spiritual vitality.”
It is not only wonderful, but it is my very life. I could not live without Christ’s life being in me.